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PORTLAND, OREGON A. D. 1999

AND OTHER SKETCHES

"+Tales of the Sierras+" "+Looking Backward at Portland+" +Etc.+

+F. W. Baltes and Company+ +Portland, Oregon+ 1913

+Copyrighted 1913+

Dedication

TO THE CITIZENS OF PORTLAND AND TO THE DEAR FRIENDS OF MY EARLIER LIFE THIS VOLUME IS LOVINGLY DEDICATED

+Contents+

The Bad Man From Bodie 43 He Never Came Back 51 Where Did You Get That Oil? 55 A Grapevine Telegraph Line 59 Along the Shore 63 Showing Off 67 "Knifin' de Dough" 71 A Musical Aborigine 75 "The Gentleman of Havre" 77 On the Wing 79 He Knew a Good Thing 83 Inadequate Cuspidors 87 No Jobs, But Vacancies 89 Phenomenal Telegraphing 91 His Old Kentucky Home 95 The Office at Spirit Lake 97 The Indians Were Too Loyal 99 A Governor for Fifteen Minutes Took the Bull by the Horns 101 The Seven Mounds 105 When Gold Grew on Sage Brush 111

PREFACE.

In introducing my little romance to the public, I do so with little misgivings or apologies.

The close observer will agree that the changes that are anticipated-- here related as established facts--are merely the signs of the times, and that not one-half of the story is told.

One might wish to be a living witness of the great projects occurring A. D. 1999, and may possibly resent that he was not born later on in the cycles of Time, but if his heart is in the right place he can realize that there is nothing lost, and his soul goes marching onward and upward in its eternal flight.

+Portland, Oregon, A. D. 1999+

+Portland, Oregon, A. D. 1999+

+The Visitor.+

My caller was a queer little old woman. Her figure, however, was erect, her eyes bright and her voice low, soft and firm. She was becomingly dressed, in what might appear to be a Quaker garb, and a look of rare intelligence radiated her countenance.

In a deep, sweet voice, she began:

"I was born in the year of our Lord, 1828, and am, consequently, in my 86th year. I have lived a long time, but when I glance backward, it seems but yesterday that I nestled in my mother's arms. I was born in Virginia in the year Andrew Jackson was elected President and my parents took me to Washington on the day of his inauguration. We traveled in our own vehicle, drawn by two dapple grey horses, and we had several neighbors as companions each having a conveyance of their own.

"Schools were unknown in our neighborhood and my early education was derived from my parents, principally, assisted by a maiden aunt, who spent each summer at our plantation.

"My clothes were cut out, fitted and made by my aunt, and my hats lacked any feather trimmings or other finery. The material of my dresses was generally of a slate color, and but few other shades were affected. All of our neighbors dressed in the same way, without any affectation of style whatsoever. But enough of this.

"The musical instruments of that day were the melodeon, harp and violin. There were very few of even these, and were confined, the melodeon to the village church, the violin to our darkey's cabins.

"We read by a tallow dip during the winter nights, but there was not very much to read, our library consisting of the family Bible, Bunyan's Pilgrims Progress, together with a weekly paper published in Philadelphia, that had originally been started by Benjamin Franklin.

"It was in the year 1850 that my people began talking of going West, and tried to glean all the information they could concerning the country they selected, the best means of getting there and the prospects for disposing of our plantation. It took us three years to finish all of our preparations, and on April 18th, 1853, our caravan started on the trail leading Westward.

"I was 26 years old, and at a time of life when I could thoroughly enjoy the ever varying changes of climate and scenery.

"We found the Indians very friendly, even to kindness, and we bestowed on them many cheap trinkets in return for food and skins, of which they possessed a variety.

"We made many stops on the way as we reached the then frontier settlements, now large and prosperous cities, and it was not until we had crossed the Missouri river, near Omaha, that we began anticipating trouble from the Indians. We experienced the usual hardships and vicissitudes from this cause, nothing unusual in those times, and arrived in the then little city of Portland, March 19th, 1854.

"I startled our little party, on our arrival in Portland, by announcing that the next time I crossed the Continent it would be on the steam cars.

"Long and loudly was I laughed at for my optimism, and it did really seem impossible for a locomotive to be capable of climbing those seemingly inaccessible peaks.

"Had I prophesied all that was in my mind, my friends might have thought that I was deranged. I could have said that I could see people flying through the air in vehicles shaped like birds from the Atlantic to the Pacific and that the almost impenetrable forests of Oregon would one day be entirely laid low by the woodman's axe.

"There were many other things which I could see were bound to come but I thought it wisest to keep the light of my prophecies to myself rather than give them to unheeding ears.

"What I saw in those days, however, will not compare to the marvels which come to me now, at my advanced age.

"I have given a receptive ear to the spirit which tells me what others would pronounce 'queer notions,' but which I declare to be scientifically natural. I will tell you of all these things and you may publish them to the world, and allow them to be a judge of my optimistic views. I will tell you what I see and also of what I know is sure to come, so that all who read may know and understand, and put themselves in readiness for the great events which are bound to ensue by A. D. 1999."

The old lady then, her eyes beaming with intelligence and in the most natural and unassumed manner, voiced the following prophecies:

+The Prophecy.+

Taking a note book from her bag, and adjusting her spectacles, the old lady began her remarkable relation of events to come ere the 21st century shall have rolled around:

"Of course," she began, "I may not be able to tell you all that is in store for future generations, but I will say enough to interest everybody and to warn everybody who will care to heed my admonitions.

"The era of quick transit has already arrived and people love to travel fast, and opportunity will be given all who care to adopt this pastime. Very soon the locomotive and trolley car will be altogether too slow for travel and aerial voyages, both for pleasure and business will ensue. The force used for this purpose will be varied and may be electricity, gasoline, compressed air, or perhaps still another potent agent, at present undeveloped, which will usurp the place of all others, be cheaper, safer and more reliable than any known energy. The cars will be made entirely of steel bands and so constructed that but little damage may be apprehended from a collision with another flying machine. A parachute, arranged to work automatically will be the chief protector of this winged machine and this part of the apparatus will be so constructed as to render an accident almost an impossibility. Indeed, these carriers will be so made that a party soaring in the air at a height of 500 feet will look down and express a feeling of sympathy for those who must brave the dangers besetting life on the surface of this mundane sphere.

"These air carriers will be simple, and a good bright boy can manufacture his own vehicle to take him to and from school and at a less expense per day than is now paid for street car fare, and at a lesser risk to life and limb. The grocer will make his deliveries by his air machine. The butcher boy will abandon his automobile and bring his meat deliveries by the way the bird flies. As there can be no tracks laid in the air, no one will be pestering the City Commission for a franchise to run his company's cars over a certain strata of air, but there will be cars for hire, just the same, and there will be, no doubt, long trains operated in the air not much unlike the system at present in vogue on the surface. The death dealing automobile will be a thing of the past and even the merry motor cycle will have gone the way of the equine. Railroads and railroad stocks will suffer and the roads will languish and die. Aerial locomotion will usurp the place of the steamer and the steamship, since it will be proven to be quicker, safer and less expensive. Country homes will be easy of access and, consequently, more popular and the suburbs will be peopled by an ever-increasing number. There is no end to the advantages which the flying machine possesses over the present modes of locomotion and it is merely a question of solving the problem of entire safety, economy and simplicity of construction and operation, all of which will have been surmounted in A. D. 1999.

"Although the aerial navigation is itself an important feature of future progress, it is not at all the most prominent of innovations. I will tell you of the new era of building.

"Portland in 1913 was considered a beautiful city, but how much more beautiful does it look in 1999. I will endeavor to give you a little idea.

"The wooden houses have become a thing of the past and strong, warm concrete dwellings are the order of the day. These abodes although immensely superior to the dwellings of 1913 are less in cost and more adaptable for homes. Every working man has his own flying machine and his own home and should be happy and comfortable. The city is compact and the business houses are lofty and well constructed, safety to occupants being the chief care.

"Owing to the fact that there are few, if any, automobiles or other rapid methods of travel to take up the streets of our city, there was an order issued by the City Commissioners removing the hard surface pavements and authorizing the Commissioner of Public Service to sow the streets in rye grass and Kento a bed. He pulled one of the soft skins over him. Just as he was going to turn on his side to sleep three youths came into the chamber. Feet-in-the-Ashes sat up on the bed to look at them.

When they saw him they began to moan and groan and when he looked them over he saw they were all covered with wounds--with spear-thrusts and with sword-cuts. The sight of him in the bed, more than their wounds, made them moan and groan, and when he asked them why this was so the first of the three youths said:--

"We came here, the three of us, to fight the Giant Shamble-shanks and to take from this Island the Stone of Victory. We came to this Castle yesterday and we made three beds in this chamber so that after the combat we might rest ourselves and be healed so that we might be able to fight the Giant again to-morrow or the day after, for we know that we cannot win victory over him until many combats. Now we come back from our first fight and we find you in one of the beds we had made. We are not able to put you out of it. One of us must stay out of bed and the one that stays out will die to-night. Then we shall be only two against the Giant and he will kill us when we come to combat again." And when the first one had said all this the three youths began to moan and groan again.

Feet-in-the-Ashes got out of bed. "You can have your rest, the three of you," said he. "And as for me I can sit by the fire with my feet in the ashes as often as I did before." The three youths got into the three beds and when they were in them Feet-in-the-Ashes took the pot of balsam that his grandmother had given him and rubbed some of it on each one of them. In a while their pain and their weariness left them and their wounds closed up. Then the three youths sat up in their beds and they told Feet-in-the-Ashes their story.

"Cluck-ee, cluck-ee, cluck-ee, cluck, cluck," said the Hen-grouse, "and what was the story they told?"

"Cluck, cluck," said the Cock-grouse, "wait until you hear, cluck, cluck."

Said the first of these youths, "On this island there is a moor, and on that moor there is a stone, and that stone is not known from other stones, but it is the Stone of Victory. The Giant Shamble-shanks has not been able to find it himself, but he fights with all who come here to find it. To-day we went to the moor. As soon as we got there the Giant came out of the Grey Castle and fought with us. We fought and we fought, but he wounded us so sorely that we were like to die of our wounds. We came back to rest here. Thanks to your balsam we are cured of our wounds. We'll go to fight the Giant to-morrow, and with the surprise he'll get at seeing us before him so soon we may be able to overcome him."

"And along with the surprise, there's another thing that will help you," said Feet-in-the-Ashes, "and that is myself. I have to fight the same Giant Shamble-shanks and I may as well fight him in company as alone."

"Your help will be welcome if you have not come here to win the Stone of Victory."

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