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: MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1835-1866 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2982 MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1866-1875 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2983 MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1875-1886 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2984 MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1886-1900 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2985 MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1900-1907 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2986 MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1907-1910 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2987 THE COMPLETE MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1835-1910 by Paine #2988 THE BOYS' LIFE OF MARK TWAIN by Albert Bigelow Paine #3463 TWAIN'S LETTERS V1 1835-1866 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3193 TWAIN'S LETTERS V2 1867-1875 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3194 TWAIN'S LETTERS V3 1876-1885 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3195 TWAIN'S LETTERS V4 1886-1900 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3196 TWAIN'S LETTERS V5 1901-1906 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3197 TWAIN'S LETTERS V6 1907-1910 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3198 THE COMPLETE LETTERS OF MARK TWAIN by Albert Bigelow Paine #3199 A CHRONOLOGICAL LIST OF MARK TWAIN'S WORK FROM 1851-1910

MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY 1835-1866 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2982

Absolute unaccountability of conduct Benjamin Franklin and Samuel Clemens Bret Harte Court exertion. I love work "Do you swear?" "Not for amusement; only under pressure." Doing things and reflecting afterward Dr. Holmes's Songs in Many Keys His estimation of his own work was always unsafe Income equal to that then earned by the Vice-President of the US Jim Wolfe and the cats Kissed each other, something hitherto unknown Less than a cent an acre Man who has that eye doesn't need to go armed Never affiliate with inferiors; always climb Not Mark Twain's habit to strive for humor Nothing that glitters is gold Out of the window, and I carried the sash along with me. Perfect air of not knowing it to be humorous Ready acknowledgment of shortcoming Seeing them in print was a joy Seek companionship among men of superior intellect and character Sick were made well, and the well made better Swayed by every passing emotion and influence Twain did not remember ever having seen or heard his father lau Unerring faculty for making business mistakes Voluntarily retired from the service Ways and means were not always considered Wife was a new kind of possession

MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY 1866-1875 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2983

American habit of carrying a cotton umbrella Auntie Rachel Death that made its beginning there Does not seem to be in all respects a reptile Don't take the bull by the horns-take him by the tail Dr. John Brown Expectant look in the Eastern horizon Forgotten that he had ever had any other views He had no prejudices about clothes Jealousy Josh Billings Know so much that isn't so. Lecky's History of European Morals'; Liberty, justice, humanity Life and death that made its beginning there Likely to write not wisely but too much Ma likes funerals Mark Twain Scrap-Book Marriages are what the parties to them alone really know Nothing but almost inspired lying got me out of this scrape Ornament of a house is the friends that frequent it Potter's "English violet" order of design Praise, but not of an intemperate sort Praises to whatever seemed genuine Proceeded from unreasoned selfishness to reasoned selfishness Read not so many books, but read a few books often Ridicule to the things considered sham Selfishness Sketches which every artist has, turned face to the wall Some folks mistake vivacity for wit Terrible death to be talked to death True Story Western humor Wife was for years afflicted with freckles

MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1875-1886 by Albert Bigelow Paine, #2984

Absentmindedness Between Harte and Clemens, the whole matter was unfortunate Bible Canadian girls so pretty Cat having a fit in a platter of tomatoes Cazenova, and Rousseau. Communism is idiocy Confusions of memory and imagination Conscience ain't got no sense Consider every man colored till he is proved white Cynic; restrained Damning with faint praise Drawn the sting of my fiftieth year; taken away the pain of it Fathers be alike, mayhap; mine hath not a doll's temper Fear God and dread the Sunday-school France has neither winter, nor summer, nor morals Graham Bell Hain't we all the fools in town on our side? Happily, the little child was to evade that harsher penalty Hatred of humbug, and a scorn for cant Header Hickory-nuts I could a staid if I'd a wanted to, but I didn't want to. If loyalty to party is a form of patriotism, I am no patriot Lecky Livy, if it comforts you to lean on the Christian faith do so! Modest" Club My advice is not to raise the flag Operas Optimist Pessimist Pretty soon we shall have been dead a hundred years Religion Resenting, even when most amused by it, extravagance and burles Rubaiyat Style that is not a style at all but the very absence of it Symbol of the race ought to be a human being carrying an ax Teaspoonful of brains They fought, that a mother might own her child Under dog in the fight Well, it 'most kills me, but it pays What is Man

MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1886-1900 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2985

Address he made at Yale College And now she is dead--& I can never tell her. And of the article: "I read it to the cat Been on the verge of being an angel all my life Carbuncle is a kind of jewel Compliment that helps us on our way Defeat waits somewhere for every conqueror Don't reform any more. It is not an improvement Edited manuscript-by a half wit Embroidery line Every man is strong until his price is named Feverish desire to admire the newest thing Flood-tide is a temporary condition Genius has no youth God is on both sides in this war Good-by. Will healing ever come, or life have value again? Honor is a harder master than the law Humor should take its outings in grave company I hope his uncle's funeral will be a failure! Immensely but unintelligently interested It cannot be safe for a man at my time of life to laugh so much Just say the report of my death has been grossly exaggerated Letter written in a passion is a mistake Man is the only animal that blushes, or that needs to Mind, if this is going to be too much trouble to you Neither the refinement nor the weakness of a college education Never a throne which did not represent a crime Only a human being, he said, could have done these things Only by resisting temptation that men grow strong Prepared and memorized a very good speech but had forgotten it. Preserve your illusions Pronounced Mrs. Clemens free from any organic ills Put all your eggs into one basket--and watch that basket Refused ten thousand dollars for a tobacco indorsement There is not much choice between a removal & a funeral What is biography? Unadorned romance Whenever I enjoy anything in art it means that it is poor Won't be anybody for you to get acquainted with but God Won't you please say something funny?"

MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1900-1907 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2986

"Adams Memorial," by Saint-Gaudens A Dog's Tale Abhorred extortion and visible waste. After seventy we are respected--but don't need to behave American public opinion is a delicate fabric Asked forgiveness for the tears he had brought into her life Back Number Beethoven's Fifth Symphony Beethoven's sonatas and symphonies also moved him deeply Bible Blasphemy Cavalleria Rusticana Classic--something that everybody wants to have read Convenient bronchitis Count among my privileges in life that I know you, the author Covetousness to-day was the basis of all commerce Custom is custom: it is built of brass, boiler-iron Death was the thing that we did not believe in. Died at the right time, in the flower of youth and happiness Do right and you will be conspicuous Doctrine of Selfishness Don't you care more about the wretchedness of others Each letter or character should have one sound Enough of this world, and I wish I were out of it Find out what the country's customs are Gentleman Give her soap and towel, but hide the looking-glass God is sitting up nights worrying over the individuals God must love you! Hail you as the Voltaire of America Hair His conscience was always repairing itself How poor we are to-day! Human being needs to revise his ideas again about God I am as one who wanders and has lost his way I am tired & old; I wish I were with Livy I am tired wanting for that man to get old I would not call her back if I could If I could only see a dog that I knew in the old times Billiards Impatient as the Creator doubtless was to see man Impromptu speech It was his habit to grow fond of his surroundings Jester, who for forty years had been making the world laugh Last and best of life for which the first was made Learned the meaning of grief Letter on inadvertant theft on a visit to friends Life is a game of whist. Looks like a good deal of trouble for such a small result Loss of one whose memory is the only thing I worship Machine that is as unreliable as he is would have no market Man the irresponsible Machine Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired Massacre of Jews in Moscow Mental healing No general fondness for poetry; but many poems appealed to him Number of things I can remember that aren't so One could lose a dog in this bed," he declared Only dead men can tell the truth in this world Our alphabet is pure insanity Oyster has hardly any more reasoning power than a man Patriotism that proposed to keep the Stars and Stripes clean Pier Political conscience into somebody else's keeping Poorest, clumsiest excuse of all the creatures Previous-engagement plea Revelation of injustice and hypocrisy Seventy, the scriptural limitation of life Shall we ever laugh again? Smoked constantly, loathed exercise Subcutaneous injection of brandy saved her Tannhauser Teeth "The country home I need," he said, fiercely, "is a cemetery." The rest is silence There is no such thing as a new idea Threescore years and ten! To My Missionary Critics To the Person Sitting in Darkness War Prayer Was the World Made for Man We are always too busy for our children We have no real morals, but only artificial ones What an amusing creature the human being is!" What are you going to do, you poor soul? Wheresoever she was, there was Eden Would you do it again if you had the chance? Yes, we are a sufficiently comical invention, we humans

MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1907-1910 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2987

THE COMPLETE MARK TWAIN, A BIOGRAPHY, 1835-1910 by Albert Bigelow Paine #2988

THE BOYS' LIFE OF MARK TWAIN by Albert Bigelow Paine #3463

It was the 2d of February, 1870, that Samuel Clemens and Olivia Langdon were married. A few days before, he sat down one night and wrote to Jim Gillis, away out in the Tuolumne Hills, and told him of all his good fortune, recalling their days at Angel's Camp, and the absurd frog story, which he said had been the beginning of his happiness. In the five years since then he had traveled a long way, but he had not forgotten.

"Roughing It," in fact, proved a very successful book. Like "The Innocents Abroad," it was the first of its kind, fresh in its humor and description, true in its picture of the frontier life he had known. In three months forty thousand copies had been sold, and now, after more than forty years, it is still a popular book. The life it describes is all gone--the scenes are changed. It is a record of a vanished time--a delightful history--as delightful to-day as ever.

England fairly reveled in Mark Twain. At one of the great banquets, a roll of the distinguished guests was called, and the names properly applauded. Mark Twain, busily engaged in low conversation with his neighbor, applauded without listening, vigorously or mildly, as the others led. Finally a name was followed by a great burst of long and vehement clapping. This must be some very great person indeed, and Mark Twain, not to be outdone in his approval, stoutly kept his hands going when all others had finished.

"Whose name was that we were just applauding?" he asked of his neighbor. --"Mark Twain's."

They remained for a time in London--a period of honors and entertainment. If Mark Twain had been a lion on his first visit, he was hardly less than royalty now. His rooms at the Langham Hotel were like a court. The nation's most distinguished men--among them Robert Browning, Sir John Millais, Lord Houghton, and Sir Charles Dilke--came to pay their respects. Authors were calling constantly. Charles Reade and Wilkie Collins could not get enough of Mark Twain. Reade proposed to join with him in writing a novel, as Warner had done. Lewis Carroll did not call, being too timid, but they met the author of "Alice in Wonderland" one night at a dinner, "the shyest full-grown man, except Uncle Remiss, I ever saw," Mark Twain once declared.

At Quarry Farm that summer Mark Twain began the writing of "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer." He had been planning for some time to set down the story of those far-off days along the river-front at Hannibal, with John Briggs, Tom Blankenship, and the rest of that graceless band, and now in the cool luxury of a little study which Mrs. Crane had built for him on the hillside he set himself to spin the fabric of his youth. The study was a delightful place to work. It was octagonal in shape, with windows on all sides, something like a pilot-house. From any direction the breeze could come, and there were fine views. To Twichell he wrote:

"I came in with Halley's comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's comet."

The terms of Samuel Clemens's apprenticeship were the usual thing for that day: board and clothes--"more board than clothes, and not much of either," Mark Twain used to say.

"If your memory extends so far back, you will recall a little sandy- haired boy of nearly a quarter of a century ago, in the printing-office at Hannibal, over the Brittingham drug-store, mounted upon a little box at the case, who used to love to sing so well the statement of the poor drunken man who was supposed to have fallen by the wayside, 'If ever I get up again, I'll stay up--if I kin.'"

"Do you swear?"--"N-not for amusement; only under pressure."

"When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not; but I am getting old, and soon I shall remember only the latter."

TWAIN'S LETTERS V1 1835-1866 by A. B. Paine #3193

A mighty national menace to sham All talk and no cider Condition my room is always in when you are not around Deprived of the soothing consolation of swearing Frankness is a jewel; only the young can afford it Genius defies the laws of perspective Hope deferred maketh the heart sick I never greatly envied anybody but the dead In the long analysis of the ages it is the truth that counts Just about enough cats to go round Moral bulwark reared against hypocrisy and superstition The coveted estate of silence, time's only absolute gift We went outside to keep from getting wet What a pleasure there is in revenge! When in doubt, tell the truth When it is my turn, I don't

TWAIN'S LETTERS V2 1867-1875 by A. B. Paine #3194

DEAR REDPATH,--I wish you would get me released from the lecture at Buffalo. I mortally hate that society there, and I don't doubt they hired me. I once gave them a packed house free of charge, and they never even had the common politeness to thank me. They left me to shift for myself, too, a la Bret Harte at Harvard. Get me rid of Buffalo! Otherwise I'll have no recourse left but to get sick the day I lecture there. I can get sick easy enough.

I send you No. 5 today. I have written and re-written the first half of it three different times, yesterday and today, and at last Mrs. Clemens says it will do. I never saw a woman so hard to please about things she doesn't know anything about. Yours ever, MARK.

This is the place to get a poor opinion of everybody in. There isn't one man in Washington, in civil office, who has the brains of Anson Burlingame--and I suppose if China had not seized and saved his great talents to the world, this government would have discarded him when his time was up. There are more pitiful intellects in this Congress! Oh, geeminy! There are few of them that I find pleasant enough company to visit. I am most infernally tired of Wash. and its "attractions." To be busy is a man's only happiness--and I am--otherwise I should die Yrs. aff. SAM.

TWAIN'S LETTERS V3 1876-1885 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3195

It is interesting to note that in thanking Clemens for his compliment Howells wrote: "What people cannot see is that I analyze as little as possible; they go on talking about the analytical school, which I am supposed to belong to, and I want to thank you for using your eyes..... Did you ever read De Foe's 'Roxana'? If not, then read it, not merely for some of the deepest insights into the lying, suffering, sinning, well-meaning human soul, but for the best and most natural English that a book was ever written in."

Pray offer my most sincere and respectful approval to the President--is approval the proper word? I find it is the one I most value here in the household and seldomest get.

In the same letter he suggests to his brother that he undertake an absolutely truthful autobiography, a confession in which nothing is to be withheld. He cites the value of Casanova's memories, and the confessions of Rousseau.

And I say this also: He that waiteth for all men to be satisfied with his plan, let him seek eternal life, for he shall need it.

Well-good-bye, and a short life and a merry one be yours. Poor old Methusaleh, how did he manage to stand it so long?

You are assisted in your damaging work by the tyrannous ways of a village--villagers watch each other and so make cowards of each other.

TWAIN'S LETTERS V4 1886-1900 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3196

And I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55 Argument against suicide Conversationally being yelled at Dead people who go through the motions of life Die in the promptest kind of a way and no fooling around Heroic endurance that resembles contentment Honest men must be pretty scarce I wonder how they can lie so. It comes of practice, no doubt If this is going to be too much trouble to you One should be gentle with the ignorant Sunday is the only day that brings unbearable leisure Symbol of the human race ought to be an ax What a pity it is that one's adventures never happen!

TWAIN'S LETTERS V5 1901-1906 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3197

I have seen that iceberg thirty-four times in thirty-seven voyages; it is always the same shape, it is always the same size, it always throws up the same old flash when the sun strikes it; you may set it on any New York door-step of a June morning and light it up with a mirror-flash; and I will engage to recognize it. It is artificial, and it is provided and anchored out by the steamer companies. I used to like the sea, but I was young then, and could easily get excited over any kind of monotony, and keep it up till the monotonies ran out, if it was a fortnight.

It vexes me to catch myself praising the clean private citizen Roosevelt, and blaming the soiled President Roosevelt, when I know that neither praise nor blame is due to him for any thought or word or deed of his, he being merely a helpless and irresponsible coffee-mill ground by the hand of God.

It was a presidential year and the air was thick with politics. Mark Twain was no longer actively interested in the political situation; he was only disheartened by the hollowness and pretense of office-seeking, and the methods of office-seekers in general.

Shall we ever laugh again? If I could only see a dog that I knew in the old times! and could put my arms around his neck and tell him all, everything, and ease my heart. Think--in 3 hours it will be a week!--and soon a month; and by and by a year. How fast our dead fly from us.

Aldrich was here half an hour ago, like a breeze from over the fields, with the fragrance still upon his spirit. I am tired of waiting for that man to get old.

When a man is a pessimist before 48 he knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little.

TWAIN'S LETTERS V6 1907-1910 by Albert Bigelow Paine #3198

That doctor had half an idea that there is something the matter with my brain. . . Doctors do know so little and they do charge so much for it.

You ought not to say sarcastic things about my "fighting on the other side." General Grant did not act like that. General Grant paid me compliments. He bracketed me with Zenophon--it is there in his Memoirs for anybody to read. He said if all the confederate soldiers had followed my example and adopted my military arts he could never have caught enough of them in a bunch to inconvenience the Rebellion. General Grant was a fair man, and recognized my worth; but you are prejudiced, and you have hurt my feelings.

DEAR HOWELLS,--I have to write a line, lazy as I am, to say how your Poe article delighted me; and to say that I am in agreement with substantially all you say about his literature. To me his prose is unreadable--like Jane Austin's. No, there is a difference. I could read his prose on salary, but not Jane's. Jane is entirely impossible. It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death.

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