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Illustrator: T. Rowlandson
THE MILITARY ADVENTURES OF JOHNNY NEWCOME
'He jests at Scars, who never felt a Wound' --+Shakespeare+
THE MILITARY ADVENTURES OF JOHNNY NEWCOME
WITH AN ACCOUNT OF HIS CAMPAIGN ON THE PENINSULA AND IN PALL MALL AND NOTES
BY AN OFFICER
WITH FIFTEEN COLOURED SKETCHES BY T. ROWLANDSON
A NEW EDITION
METHUEN AND CO. LONDON 1904
NOTE
This Issue is founded on the original Edition printed for Patrick Martin in the year 1816.
DEDICATION
TO THE SUBALTERNS OF THE BRITISH ARMY
LIST OF THE PLATES
Getting into his Billet " 41
Taking his Breakfast " 49
Introduced to his Colonel " 62
Smells powder for the first time " 76
Half Rations " 78
Learning to Smoke and drink Grog " 80
Poor Johnny on the sick List " 83
Going Sick to the Rear " 85
Johnny safe returned to his Mama " 94
Dash'd with his Suite for Santarem that Night " 152
Johnny on Duty with his Chief " 158
Presenting the Trophies " 236
THE MILITARY ADVENTURES OF JOHNNY NEWCOME
END OF PART I
FOOTNOTES
This species of partial puffing is carried too far. It reminds me of something of a similar tendency, that panegerized a young Count who was killed by a +Broad-Wheeled Waggon+.
With respect to the Officers at Lisbon, who were there either on duty, or leave, or otherwise, the variety of their dress became at length so ridiculous that Major-General Peacock was obliged to issue a severe Order, restricting them to the use of the Regimental Great Coat, and Hat, or Cap.
Lord Wellington, in consequence of the heat of the weather, indulged the Officers in wearing loose Great Coats; but this was soon followed up with waistcoats of all sorts, and colours, with filagree gold, or silver buttons, and what were called Forage Caps, of all fancies and shapes. They only wanted the appendage of Bells.
All Officers under the rank of Field-Officer, on landing at Lisbon, were ordered to report themselves at the Town-Major's Office, and were from thence sent to the Belem Dep?t, to be disposed of by the Commandant there.
'No intende,' in Portuguese, signifies 'don't understand.'
The Barracks at Belem were assigned as a general receptacle for Detachments coming from England, and all recovered Men. Captain Brown, of the 23rd Regiment , made the arrangements for the march of Parties to join the Army, apportioned the number of Officers; and gave them orders, and directions for their conduct. Sometimes he permitted Officers to proceed alone to join their Regiments, but generally they were attached to Parties.
One general Rout to the Army was established, and the distances so divided, and Dep?ts formed, that the parties could be provisioned every three or four Days; a Commandant, and Adjutant, with requisite non-commissioned officers, being established at each Dep?t, together with a Commissariat and an Hospital; and though last, not, unfortunately, the least necessary, a Provost-Marshal.
The opening of the Odoriferous Sluices generally commences about 9 o'clock P.M. and continues, without intermission, for about two hours, and woe to those unfortunates whose business, or pleasure, leads them forth during this display of Portuguese cleanliness!
There are certain regulations respecting this filthy outrage, such as requiring those people to call out three times, by way of warning the Foot-passenger of his danger, and the offenders are likewise liable to be called to some sort of reckoning; but the Laws, and the administration of the Laws, are altogether so defective, that it is very difficult to get redress, in cases in which robbery, or even murder, have been committed. Nay, I this moment see a Villain at large, who, without receiving any offence, but what he chose to consider one, on a young Officer's looking at a Girl, actually followed him, and struck him from behind with a stick so heavily as to brake his arm. The fellow was taken up, and evidences produced, proving the fact: but he is protected by his master , and at this moment insolently stares a British officer in the face.
English Guineas, at that time, had no attraction. The Dollar, or Moidore, was the medium; but since the Guineas have been introduced in payment of the Army, the Portuguese seem to appreciate their value.
It was customary for Officers who wanted Cash to give their Draft on some House in London, &c. &c.; but it was purchasing Money very expensively, giving at the rate of six Shillings and Sixpence for a Dollar that would bring only five Shillings; thus losing eighteen-pence on every five Shillings.
The Portuguese greeting each other, embrace; a practice certainly strange to a Briton, and recollecting the effluvia of garlic, is horribly offensive.
Messrs. Smith and Co. opened a Warehouse of English goods, where an Officer might suit himself with every article of wearing apparel, and furniture for the animals, &c.
The scarcity of forage rendered it necessary to curtail the quantity of animals allowed for the use of the army. This fell somewhat hard on Subaltern Officers, who were obliged so to contract their baggage as to deprive themselves of many articles actually necessary to their convenience. That something to wear--something to sleep on--something to eat--and something to cook with--were really necessary for existence; and only one miserable animal was allowed to carry what was so essential for two Subaltern Officers; but it was unfortunately the case.
Senhor Cavigole, as well as many others, Misters and Senhors, kept shops replete with stores of all sorts, which they sold at a very high price, but with which officers knew they must be supplied; for the hungry French had deprived the Portuguese of that little they possessed; and it did happen, and not unfrequently, that divisions had been so scantily supplied with rations, that even a private soldier has been known to give a Dollar for one biscuit, and glad to satisfy his hunger at that enormous rate.
The Subaltern Officers, in the Portuguese service, were taken from very humble situations, and of course are not treated by their countrymen with the distinction and respect which British Officers claim; consequently, where Quarters or Billets are disposed according to rank, the Portuguese Alfares, or Ensigns, are thrust into any wretched hovel, and, from the ignorance of the country magistrates, the British Subaltern Officers were not unfrequently treated with as little ceremony: many of them were billeted in the most wretched, filthy, miserable dwellings, which among a race of people so excessively nasty in themselves, rendered the officers particularly uncomfortable.
Immediately in the vicinity of Lisbon, a person may contrive at the inns, or rather wine houses, to be somewhat better accommodated than at a Subaltern's billet.
No disrespect is intended, but until one can 'make a Silk Purse of a Sow's ear,' we must be content to submit to the 'insolence of Office.'
THE MILITARY ADVENTURES OF JOHNNY NEWCOME
PART II
THE MILITARY ADVENTURES OF JOHNNY NEWCOME
PART II
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