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Read Ebook: Penelope: A Comedy in Three Acts by Maugham W Somerset William Somerset
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Ebook has 2384 lines and 21380 words, and 48 pages
PEYTON.
Very good, ma'am.
BARLOW.
MRS. GOLIGHTLY.
My dear Davenport, what are you talking about?
My dear, you're the last person I expected to find here. I thought there was a meeting of the Missionary Society at the Albert Hall.
Mrs. O'Farrell said, will you have a glass of barley-water, sir?
GOLIGHTLY.
Barley-water!
PEYTON.
GOLIGHTLY.
It's very kind of you to have taken so much trouble.
PEYTON.
Thank you, sir.
My dear, I think it's very hard that you should have brought up our only child on the idea that my favourite form of refreshment is barley-water.
BARLOW.
It looks as if Penelope expected you, too.
GOLIGHTLY.
I've just had a wire from her.
BARLOW.
Have you? I wonder why on earth she wired to you.
MRS. GOLIGHTLY.
It's so extraordinary that she shouldn't be here. It makes me feel very nervous.
GOLIGHTLY.
Well, frankly, I couldn't make head or tail of it, so I jumped into a motor cab and came round from the club at once.
I've just had a telegram from Penelope asking me to come at once. Will you let Mrs. O'Farrell know I'm here?
GOLIGHTLY.
She's out.
PEYTON.
Thank you.
PEYTON.
Very good, sir.
I think I can put your minds at rest. I am in a position to explain the whole matter to you. The telegram she sent me makes it perfectly clear. I daresay you know that the Archduchess Anastasia is a patient of Dickie's. And a very nice patient for him to have. I've never met her, though I happen to know several members of her family, and she's a very cultivated, pleasant woman. I've always said to Dickie that that is the sort of practice he ought to get. The middle classes do a doctor no good.
GOLIGHTLY.
My dear Davenport, do go on with your story.
BARLOW.
Well, it appears that the Archduchess Anastasia has signified her desire to know Penelope. Very charming and graceful action on her part, and just like her. Of course she's extremely grateful to Dickie for all he's done. He's worked a miraculous cure, and I daresay she's heard that Penelope is my niece. It's a maxim you can always go on: royalty knows everything. And the long and the short of it is that she's coming to lunch here. Of course Penelope knows nothing about these matters, and in a state of great excitement she's sent for me. It's the best thing she could do. I can tell her everything. I've lived in that set all my life. It's nothing to be particularly proud about--mere accident of birth--I happen to be a gentleman. A certain family. Well, there it is, you see.
GOLIGHTLY.
But do you mean to say that Penelope wired all that to you? It must have cost her a perfect fortune.
BARLOW.
She put it a little more briefly, of course, but that was the gist of it.
BEADSWORTH.
I can't imagine why she should send for me because a royalty is coming to luncheon with her. It was very inconvenient to get away. I had a dozen people waiting to see me, and I was obliged to slip out by the back door in order to avoid them.
GOLIGHTLY.
But what are the exact words of the wire she sent you, Davenport?
BARLOW.
You can see it if you like. "Come at once. Archduchess Anastasia. Penelope."
GOLIGHTLY.
But d'you mean to say that you made up all that story out of those three words?
BARLOW.
Penelope knew I had a certain amount of intelligence. She didn't want to waste her money, so she just put what was essential, and left me to gather the rest.
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