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Read Ebook: King Arthur's Socks and Other Village Plays by Dell Floyd
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Ebook has 1946 lines and 41673 words, and 39 pages
HUMAN NATURE: A Very Short Morality Play,
THE CHASTE ADVENTURES OF JOSEPH: A Comedy,
THE ANGEL INTRUDES: A Comedy,
LEGEND: A Romance,
SWEET-AND-TWENTY: A Comedy,
A LONG TIME AGO: A Tragic Fantasy,
ENIGMA: A Domestic Conversation,
IBSEN REVISITED: A Piece of Foolishness,
KING ARTHUR'S SOCKS: A Comedy,
THE RIM OF THE WORLD: A Fantasy,
POOR HAROLD: A Comedy,
HUMAN NATURE
A VERY SHORT MORALITY PLAY
TO ARTHUR DAVISON FICKE
This is a much changed version of "A Five Minute Problem Play," originally given at the Liberal Club, New York City, in 1913.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE Well, I think that is all. You've seen everything now.
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE It has all been very interesting, and I don't know how to thank you for the trouble you've taken.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Don't mention it. That's my business, you know--to show young and curious Spirits what there is to see in the universe. And I must say that you've been an exceptionally patient pupil. I don't usually take as much time with youngsters as I have with you. But when I find someone as interested in the universe as you are, I don't mind spending a few more eons on the job. We've been all around, this trip. I don't believe we've missed anything of any importance. But if there is anything else you can think of that you'd like to see--
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. Well, there is one place . . . It's only mentioned in a footnote in the guide-book, but for that very reason I thought perhaps--
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. You have the right attitude. There's nothing too small or insignificant to know about. Do you remember the name of the place?
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. No, but-- Here it is. Earth, it's called.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Ah, yes, there is such a place. . . .
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. The guide-book doesn't give any information about it. Just mentions its name.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Well, there isn't very much to say about it. After what you've seen, you wouldn't be impressed by its art or its architecture, . . . Still, it has one curious feature that perhaps you'd be interested in. It's--
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. Yes?
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Perhaps I had better just show you, and let you make what you can of it.
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. As you say.
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Here, then--look for yourself!
THE MAN. No! No! I must not!
THE WOMAN. No! No! We must not!
THE MAN. We must not--
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. It is strange. I've seen nothing like that anywhere in the universe. But why do you suppose--
THE FIRST CELESTIAL FIGURE. Oh, as to that, I really cannot say. It's what is called "Human nature."
THE SECOND CELESTIAL FIGURE. Oh!
THE CHASTE ADVENTURES OF JOSEPH
A COMEDY
"The Chaste Adventures of Joseph" was first produced at the Liberal Club, New York City, in 1914, with the following cast:
Madam Potiphar ....... Louise Murphy Asenath .............. Marjorie Jones Potiphar ............. Berkeley Tobey Joseph ............... Floyd Dell Slave ................ Maurice Becker
THE LADY. Such a lovely house, Madam Potiphar!--But what is this quiet room? Your husband's study?
MADAM POTIPHAR. Oh, this is nothing--merely the room of one of the slaves. Come, dear Cousin Asenath, and I will show you the garden. The pomegranates are just beginning to blossom.
ASENATH. The room of a slave? Indeed! He seems to be an educated person!
MADAM POTIPHAR. Educated? Oh, yes--he is a sort of book-keeper for Potiphar. At least, that is what he is supposed to be. But he is never on hand when he is wanted. If he were here, we might get him to show us through the vineyard.
ASENATH. Why not send for him? I would love to see the vineyard before your husband takes me out in the chariot.
MADAM POTIPHAR. Send for Joseph? It would be useless. Joseph has affairs of his own on hand, always.
ASENATH. Joseph! Is that his name?
MADAM POTIPHAR. Yes--"Joseph." An ugly, foreign-sounding name, don't you think?
ASENATH. It is rather an odd name--but I've heard it before. It was the name of a youth who used to be one of my father's slaves in Heliopolis.
MADAM POTIPHAR. Heliopolis? I wonder--what was he like?
ASENATH. Oh, he was a pretty boy, with nice manners.
MADAM POTIPHAR. I thought for a moment it might be the same one. But this Joseph is an ill-favoured creature--and insolent. . . . What colour was his hair?
MADAM POTIPHAR. It's nice to see you again, dear Asenath. We haven't seen each other since we were little girls. Do you remember how we played together in the date-orchard? And the long, long talks we had?
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