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COMPLIMENTS OF THE SEASON.
CASE OF REAL DISTRESS.
WE do not covet the post of Prime Minister, nor yet that of Lord Chancellor, especially if, when Parliament re-assembles, a recent judicial appointment should be sharply discussed. We can think of the choice of a new Speaker without discontent with our own lowly lot, and at the present time envy of the Lord Chief Justice of the Common Pleas is not the predominant feeling in our breasts. But of all places, posts, offices, appointments, and dignities within the reach of an Englishman, the one which excites in us the least desire is that of "Examiner of Plays."
Who, with a heart, can resist feelings of the deepest commiseration, the most profound pity for the sufferings of another, when he hears that in twelve short years it has been the unhappy lot of the present Examiner to read one thousand eight hundred dramatic pieces--one thousand eight hundred tragedies, comedies, melodramas, farces, pantomimes, burlesques, and extravaganzas? There are labours which no salary can remunerate, services which no fees can requite.
A DISTINGUISHED "FRIEND."
A QUAKER a Grand Cross! We should as soon have expected to be introduced to a Quaker Field Marshal. Henceforth the sensation of surprise must be numbered amongst the lost feelings. Nothing now can move us more. Not the sun rising in the west, not the spectacle of an Irish Roman Catholic Bishop teaching in a Protestant Sunday school, not a Teetotal Lord Mayor, not the appointment of MR. TOMLINE as Master of the Mint, or SIR CHARLES DILKE as Lord-Lieutenant of Middlesex, not the total abolition of the Income Tax, not the conversion of MR. WHALLEY and MR. NEWDEGATE to Popery, not the purification of the streets,--no, not even the bestowal of the Grand Cross of our own Order of the Bath on some Englishman eminent in Art, Literature, or Science!
HOME-RULE.
HAS Repeal, that in 'Forty was folly, Grown sense in Eighteen-seventy-two? Will the walls that defied Big DAN'S volley, Be by BUTT'S brass two-pounder split through?
Has PADDY, that still has craved ruling And rulers, in wrong as in right, Of a sudden out-grown schools and schooling, And shot to Self-Government's height?
And was it but bottomless boasting, With a point from Hibernian wit,-- That there ne'er yet was Irishman roasting, But an Irishman's hand turned the spit?
Is it JOHN that across the Atlantic Stamps PAT Order's foe ever known; And declares him a nuisance gigantic, Till Yankee Home-Rule ousts his own?
Must hist'ry, as writ all untruly, Like Hebrew, be read in reverse, That, since STRONG-BOW, shows Ireland unruly, With lawlessness cursed as chief curse?
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